Today records the 18th year of my “married” status. I have come this far?! From a carefree young lady, with not much care of what really going on around the world to tying the knot which immediately earned me the status of a wife and years later, mother of two lovely children. Of all the hard work, one look at the children’s faces would immediately erase away years of achy muscles, wrinkles and exhaustion. Worth it!
This year, I have decided not to count anymore from now onwards and not to make a big deal out of an anniversary. Every year is a milestone reached, every year is a celebration of growth, life and love. Let’s just not expect too much from each other. Sharing our lives for so many years is good enough. When we expect too much, we expose ourselves to unnecessary stress and much disappointment. Why live life with so much stress? Just take what comes by and cherish each one of them. Life should be happier once the right expectation is set, especially for a marriage to stay on.
My parents have been married for 50 years and I can see the love in them. No marriage is perfect. Arguments, celebrations, misunderstandings, laughters and tears are the basic ingredients in all marriages. That makes life less boring. However, be careful not to let any problem sits for too long. Resolve it as soon as possible, so to reduce the degree of hurt it brings to any one or both parties.
Love itself is a mystery. Keeping the flame of love after marriage gets more and more complicated as years gone by. Why is that so? Simply because nothing much surprises us anymore. Nothing much excites us as it used to be in the first couple of years of early marriage. However, over the years, most of us have grown up and established new goals and purpose for our families. We start to view lives from a different light. Things become more practical and realistic.
All being said, anniversary is just another day….no big hoo-hah about it. Counting the years give different people different reaction. For me, it is like the clock ticking. I feel this way because I prefer to live life a day at a time and cherish every moment in it. Life is too short to be spent counting the years and expecting lots from the spouse.
What does anniversary mean to you? How do you feel when you count year by year?
Today, I accept it as any other day. Work, chatting with friends, making people smile, hug my children, receive whatever hubby presents to me or not, watch my Korean drama, dine with family and retire for the day. Another day well-spent!
Cheers to all.
~ Alice N.